thanks to evonne, averse and justin

今天真的很高兴，高兴到要写中文。与其说高兴倒不如说温馨比较恰当。觉得上天对小弟蛮好的了，做么要这么说呢？离开马大之后，觉得世界是黑暗的，灰的…所以就一直地伤心，难过….上了utar之后觉得人有了目标，比以前开朗很多。回想起离开马大四个月多的期间真的很难捱，像行尸走肉酱。
虽然离开了马大的同学及学长姐们，不过在utar认识了一班真的很不错的朋友。老天真的对小弟很好很好了，我失去了某些东西，它补回一些东西给我。Utar有什么很不错的朋友呢？就由女生说起啦，她-evonne. 真的很谢谢她，在小弟上个星期情绪超低落的时候安慰我，无时无刻都msn我，鼓励我。carl .. in tis world .. many ppl have their own sad and tough story. wanna happy always .. just depends how to c through and how u treat it. anyway .. i hope u can be strong .. i can be ... sure u can too .. ganbateh !! if u reli wanna to change .. i will there to help u. but proved to me tat u reli wanna to change .. nt just say say. if nt .. i will very dissappointed on u .. just change ur view toward those sadness. then automatically u can be strong. treat it as motivation. proved to those tat critic and blaMe u tat u are the best, proved to them .. they are wrong. get it ? opstimic is my slogan Leh. i oredi give u .. hope u appreciate it. i wont said the 2nd tiMe le. u r guy .. shud be more strong d. i hope tis is the last tiMe u told me about those sad thing de. i hope once day if u faced probLem .. u wil tell me " evonne , i m sad .. but dun worry .. is not a big deal " u gt study ? un becoz of sad .. then no heart study

当时看到真的很感动的，眼眶湿了。酱的朋友哪里找？小弟真的很荣幸跟她同一班。

男生有-averse, justin.他们两位是PR班里很帅的帅哥。两位大小弟四天八天。前者还刚刚训完我一顿，半夜在msn上骂我呢。不过小弟真的做错事情，很糟！弄生气他！对不起！以后跟人沟通时尽量不用猜这个technique，用问因为我时常猜错。因为我没存他骂我的档案，所以不能秀出来。后者呢就是谢谢他的生日礼物，这位帅哥跟他不是很熟，不过可以感觉到他是一位很男人，以后一定会与他跟好。他与evonne送礼物给我。在此跟你们说那个香水真的很香，很适合我。
Averse也有送叻。今天收到。GASTSBY LONG-KEEP WAX SPRAY.哇，真的很高兴。他还跟我说迟来的礼物。这位仁兄他很有心，我才刚认识了他们四个月就出手这么重了。

P/S : 小弟不是为了收到礼物才这么说的。现实中他们真的很好，每一位都有值得学习的地方。例如，他们的自信，他们的沟通技巧……现在可以变成型男了，有香水，deodorant让接近我的人不会觉得我有异味。有WAX SPRAY可以塑照发型。谢谢你们。真的很感谢你们。明年的10/2，14/4，18/4。小弟知道会怎么办的啦……

averse teach me some good things already. thank you.

today i learn new things from averse brother already. he teaches me one very important things. Tat is "do not guess people mind and put into own opinion". this lesson really teach me something.

however, it remain some controvesy here. if v dont guess in certain circumstances that what will happen next, then some crisis might occur. however, i also agree what averse has been said, if v simply guess people thinking and put into own opinion. many bad effect will occurred such as just now i cause him very mad twice. here i take advantage to say sorrry to him, 真的很对不起。请接受小弟的抱歉。

too many guessing at my life until now. i noe its hard to get rid of this behaviour but i must try my best. last time i always guess why this good friend dont play wit me. (he or she doesnt like me already? why he like that one? do i do something wrong?) actually i should guess so much de, the most easy is to ask him and trust what he or she say to u.

Bsides not to guess, believe or trust is also important. last time i do not trust my friend and always suspect that they are not friend wit me, this is wrong. indeed!

advise from many ppl

Just now read thru the history that ryan, eric and sk gives me. I feel very sad when scroll down the conversation history. I noe their intention is correct de but it causes me very sad and lonely. What should I do now? I don’t know.

Eric, seems like what I have plan to do in order to achieve mature its wrong de. “什么啦叫我看你的部落格什么什么啦！老实说我觉得统统都是废话连篇！” what should I response him? I write blog is just another way to express my feeling. Why u do not get what I mean? Fine, I plan 等我真的长大了，就去烦您, as I think not meet him for sometime might let me to plan what can I do to address this problems, he reply me 我很肯定你永远都长不到! 一个人成长不成长是别人给你的形容,不是因为为了得到别人所谓的这种称赞而虚伪的去做只因为了一种肯定一种别人无聊的肯定。成熟是否不是表面的,是发自内心的。是一种由心而发的成长,不是去跟从所谓的社会固定形式的成熟论而去做。你成长是因为你自己不是为别人,为了让自己进步。If u purpose is want me to judge u again when v meet i can straight away tell u d! u r failed again! Yup, I always behave wrongly in front of u. I’m failure, failure indeed when I friend wit u. I born to be fail one.

He says really sad to c u like that! i din said u r failure or look dw on u. I never think that at all. Fine, stop the conversation, don’t kacau me. c all ur mistakes come out d, always like that. thats all la, dont make friend wit failure la. ok! as u like! but u still my frenz! i din said u'r not my frenz! Ok! Do whatever u like! but please rmb what i told u the last listen anot is up to u! i treat u as my frenz i only said so if other i wont fuck them off at all!!! 一个人成长不成长是别人给你的形容不是因为为了得到别人所谓的这种称赞而虚伪的去做只因为了一种肯定一种别人无聊的肯定。成熟是否不是表面的是发自内心的。是一种由心而发的成长不是去跟从所谓的社会固定形式的成熟论而去做。你成长是因为你自己不是为别人为了让自己进步

Now what should I do now? I lost contact with him already. Really don’t want to see him for long period then find ways to become mature? When think I’m mature then only go to find him? I don’t know need how long to do that. How long don’t meet him? Half year? Two years? Really don’t know. I seems like lose him already.

Ryan, he says: ”your relationship, your temper, your character. all of tis is it sum way u do some miztake n tat y u cant get d real fren n some time ppl dun like u. ppl dun like talk 2 u. ppl dun like play 2 u n dun date u even hv sum activity b coz your internal nt strong enough. b coz your temper, your attitude. when u dun like somthing all u put in front of your face n sometime ppl ask u sumthing u do like dun noe n your conversation nt strong enough n sometime b come 'alone". walk alone, dun wan mix wif your fren. When play in crazy. u not crazy enough. Not crazy when play games.”

Sk, I don’t want to hide this guy anymore. Last time when I friend wit him, he can sense that I tend to hide something. He can sense that my anger easily express on my face. His response is almost same as eric. I always promise him to become mature but just talk only.

Parents become stop those advise already especially my mothers. Always say im failure. Leave that school is the most terrible things im do. What should i do now? Instead of always listen to those things repeatly, why bother to go bk? next semester do not go bk so often, ok? sure.

dad birthday + scolded + plan

actually my action is correct anot? purposely come bl to c my dad. he is birthday today. so i drive bk motor to c him for awhile. haha... but got side effect, get scolded by my mother seriously. always talk bk the same incident. dont read UM is the most stupid things that i have done. walao, want to say until like that meh? quite sad when heard those advise again. so i have decided not to go bk so often at next semester. can u do it, carl?

carl, u are big already. no longer kids before. so, grow up ok? have decided not to c eric? yup, since he said i need to b more mature then must b mature ar. so, what u plan to do wit him, carl? erm... dont c him la. haha... what i mean is minimize the chance to see him. meanwhile u must grow up then during the time v meet, prove to him that u have grown up already, ok? after take bk my hp, when is the next time to c him? i think is feb 2009 during his birthday guah. add oil, ok?

thanks to jimmy yeo that share his past experience to me. really thanks alot. he go thru alot of things then only can mature until this level. how about u ar?

sorry

my action correct anot? go to other 单位 to eat at and study 佛规 instead of go to myself 单位. i think u all dont understand what i want to deliver one. haha... so let it be.

yesterday i finish one subject already. this time is introduction to IT. what can i get? B is enough for me. come on, carl. u must humble and face wit fact la. thanks to senior that help me to clean the paper, so nice and warmth when he cares for me. hehe... hey, u all dont think to somewhere else, ok?



thanks to ryan, yeye, averse, justin, gmyao, evonne, wan koon, grace and eric that share wit me alot of their personal suggestion to me regarding on how to improve mentality. i get "advice" by ryan and eric. very sad. that all i want to say. quite sad when shoot by them. im not angry to them instead i really feel so warm and sorry.



warmth is because i can meet and make friend wit them, they are so concern me. sorry is i always continue my mistake. always repeat the same things. sorry. very sorry.

pr paper + thanks to averse

hmm... finish two papers already. feel what? feel very released lo until now dont want to study anymore. haha... carl, u really very lazy ar. haha... haih, u cant like tat de. so fast give up already. dont u say u will try ur best de mar? but cannot, really lazy ar. haih. talk bk today paper la, today paper is quite ok lo. got its difficulties also de. hope i can pass through all difficulties and get an A- la. B+ also can de. hehe... i dare not brave to say must get A as i know i must humble de mar. somemore i dont have ability to score. haih... i wonder to know that y this word, haih can appear so many times in my life. carl, dont sigh already. ok?

got one quite happy de is i confirm got present from this guy, mr.averse. though my birthday pass already but he still give present to me. so sweet. hehe... i ask him why he gives me present de? v just noe 3 months then he says its only gift. but it need $ ge wor, thus u must appreciate it lo. averse, u geng ar. okla, i will use the perfume de. scare the smell will change. hehe... thanks, averse. thanks for ur present wor. i tot u wont give me this year de. u so geng, got alot of new shirt to wear. ur friend give new shirt to u. geng ar. me also got la. haha...

wah, today quite hot leh. why so hot one? luckily now add the power of the fan. quite windy now. stupid carl, this also dont know need ur roommate do it for u. thanks vince.

wah, the forbidden of kingdom is nice.

yesterday got wonderful day wit birthday boy, ryan. hehe... rm10 for the forbidden of kingdom. so interesting! carl, rm10 wor! so high, do u think its worth? erm... quite worth gah! as the show is quite nice. the music is very nice. chinese orchestra music, if not mistaken. haha... jet li and jacky chan battle scene is unforgetable. so geng.

the show start at 11pm but v arrive there at 11.10pm. luckily not late for the show. ryan's driving skill is owesome. this time the audience is ryan, ka yeng, miao, oi oi and carl. the organizer for ths show today is carl! geng ar. its my responsible for held that to ryan de as today is his birthday yet i didnt do anything for him. so invite all the VIP out lo.

quite happy that mr.fong can out to play wit us. haha... eyes of m'sia close already? haiyar, cannot go to c. haih. eric, hmm... see iron man wit me ar, haha... tmw, i got exam lo. god, wish me luck la.